I am afraid I will not be able to change the situation I find myself in and this is all I will ever be. My thoughts focus on what I’m unable to do and I’m tired. I need to see a ray of light through all this fog in front of my eyes.
I feel trapped in a place where whoever I am is pushed into a big machine and turned into a cog that fits in an incoherent machine. As an individual, I am slowly fading away. Day after day I drift further away from who I am.
The place I’m in is starting to change the way I am and is not a good thing. I don’t want to run, but it’s hard for me to exist in a place that forces me to be someone else.
I pray for clarity and trust that the path ahead will become clear soon because my patience and resistance are running out. I must remember who I am because lately, I’ve let myself drawn in the way everyone around me is acting.
For a few months now, I’ve been letting the situation I’m caught in dictate the way I act and feel. This has started to change me as a person in a direction I don’t agree with. It is time to find balance again and follow my inner compass because it’s the only thing pointing in the right direction.
Every morning I pray for wisdom and patience to get me through the hard times in front of me, but what made a real difference in my perception is realizing people won’t change unless they want to. So, that means I have let myself be changed.
Now that I understood this, I can start finding my way back to the person I know I am. I can give up fear and anxiety, and the need for approval. I am the only one that needs to approve my actions and how I do things. If someone has a different opinion, they can keep it for themselves.
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