I wish to do something, but I keep lying to myself that I don’t have the time, the mood, or the energy. As long as I go on like this, I am stuck in this situation. My only exit is truth. I must be true about what I want to do in this life. I have to decide to do what is asked of me to obtain what I need.
It’s not easy to admit to myself that I’m not acting like the man I think I am. I’ve started to find shortcuts, even when I shouldn’t find them. Doing other things than the ones I want to, might mean that I lie to myself. Once I start doing what I like, it’s hard to stop and the way I feel is wonderful. To stop my lack of action I must trust my feelings will take me further.
The world doesn’t care what you do, so there’s no need to overthink. Jump to action the moment you have a clear vision of what you want to do.
Lately, I am ignoring my own advice. I tend to shy away from responsibilities more and more. I know it’s not right and I know I have to fill my place in the world. Just like a wheel from the carriage is not useful on its own, it’s the same with people. We are of not much use if we don’t fulfill our purpose.
Knowing all this, I should be doing my job, fulfilling my purpose, but at times I don’t want to. I just want to be selfish and think only about myself, like I am the only one in the world. I have no worries, no responsibilities, and my only purpose is to feel good. I can’t keep this image in my head for long though, because I’m not alone in the world. I have people I love, people I am responsible for.
No matter how overwhelming everything gets, is no use in acting like a child who doesn’t want to see reality for what it is. That’s why I try to chase away these thoughts as fast as I can.
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