What do I say now? I believe I’ll say whatever comes out. For once I won’t ponder on what I need to say. It is strange, but I feel lost in my own mind. This should not happen. I’ll try to still my mind and maybe I’ll find my way back.
The day isn’t waiting for me. Soon I’ll get up and start on what needs to be done. How I feel is not important for anyone but me. For everyone else, I always have to be calm and composed, but to me, I admit the turmoil inside.
I am scared. There is nothing to fear, but that is not important. It sometimes happens like that. Anxiety starts coming around out of nowhere and I second guess any decision or choice I have to make.
I found no reason why this happens, but I found a way to get past these moments. It is required I do nothing. I must still myself and let these feelings fall away from me.
When I am able to follow my own advice, I end up with a clear mind and a new sense of confidence. I wish I was always able to push away the anxiety and doubts, but on some days is not that easy.
I don’t know why the thought of running keeps popping in my head. It’s not like running could change anything. It would just postpone things.
I am aware that if I want to get past what’s making me want to run, I must go through it. I need to face my problems and responsibilities straight on. It is the only way to get past them.
Knowing what I must do and doing it are two different things, but I’m working on applying what I know. I still want to run, but nobody can solve my problems, because they are mine.
When thoughts of running come to me I just stay put. I remember the issue will disappear only if I solve it.
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