Finding a path to call your own has nothing to do with what happens to you, but it has everything to do with the meaning you put on that.
Moving through life can sometimes feel like driving at night, through the mist, with only one good headlight. You see the road in front of you just enough to manage.
Your life is a series of events that are tied together by you and your actions. Some of them you’ll expect, but most of them will take you by surprise, even knock you down. None of these events are meant to do you harm, even if some do, but rather to force you to become the person you need to be.
Difficulties are not welcomed by anyone, but they force us to evolve if we want to go past them. Some of us freeze when met with an obstacle, not understanding its purpose.
If now you are in a place that you got used to, it does not mean this is your place forever. To push you out of this place, force is needed, and force is always met with opposition by people.
The events in your life become connected, and make sense, only when we look back. Then we are able to understand that the hard times served a purpose. Even if going through them is not something you would choose, the person that escaped them it’s much stronger than you could’ve become any other way.
It’s time to give in to my intuition. Being right is no longer important, being happy is all that matters. My heart is perfectly clear on what I should do, my mind, not so much.
I take pride in being a cerebral person, able to pragmatically analyze all that happens in my life. This makes it hard to trust what I feel in my heart. I find no logic to this feeling. I have tried other paths, but they didn’t lead me where I need to go. They were only delays from what is calling to me.
Right now, I am living two lives. One helps me fit into the way the world works, the other allows me to create my own world and free myself from the burdens on my back.
Both are necessary. At least, that is what I’m telling myself. Maybe is only fear that keeps me from going with my feelings, rather than my mind. I don’t know, but I need to make a decision. It doesn’t have to be the best one, it just needs to be mine.
Until my days stop coming, I will be a person that, both me, as an old man, and me, as a child, can respect. Nothing is clear about how I will go from now to then, but I will use both my soul and my mind to guide me. Wherever I end up will be fine, as long as I remember who I am.
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